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Looking Back on what Confirmed my Faith

I decided to try and find out what I was saying shortly after I had an encounter with a man I can only call a prophet. It drastically changed my life for the better and I was on what I call a spiritual high for months after that.


So let's go through some things I was saying in hopes of learninghave what, if anything, I have changed my mind on since then or attitudes I had and what I has stayed the same.


I should note that I do not have full access to this kind of information for several reasons. First, because I was on a forum that I have been banned from for 5 years. IIRC I was banned in June or July of 2020. The experience I had was, as my best guess, on August 24, 2018. Part of the reason I was banned was, "Your account is suspended indefinitely for administrator review, mainly due to concerns that you are on the forum for the primary purpose of evangelizing other users, as well as concerns that you may have shared private information about [Redacted] members on other websites, and more generally due to the important workload you have create for moderators." Since I do not have access to this information, I cannot comment on it. I also have deleted some YouTube videos that I posted around the time that I got saved/my faith was confirmed. But I do have some things to share.


So, here is what I found.


The first comment I found was when I said this on the 24th,


"Here is what I actually have to say about the integration of evolution and becoming more i.e. (in this context) Shadow Work:..."


There was a video that went with the above, but I deleted it later.


I said at about 1 AM on the 25th on X,


"Been doing some shadow work lately.


The most notable difference I can think of is doing things for other people, which does not come naturally to me."


Then, I said this about an hour later on X,


"I find I am "healthier" mentally when I have a rhythm.


The rhythm doesn't need to be complex, but it can be. I find the more complex the rhythm is the healthier my psyche is. Of course, this assumes I can actually keep the rhythm and there are no significant breaks...


Because of this, listening to music is generally a good thing because it gives you rhythms to work with and keep in your head."


On August 31st, I wrote a series of messages to POD on Facebook Messenger. One of the things I said was this,


"I want to tell you guys all about what this guy told me at some point. I may write a book about it, but I want to tell you guys what I know first. I feel it was God's will for me to talk to Sonny on the 30th before the concert."


I then said on September 2nd I said on X,


"help the homeless and you will be rewarded."


Then I sent this message to the band POD on Facebook Messenger,


"Larry told me I looked like a skateboarder. He also said I looked like the disciples with my long hair.


I didn't "get it" until I posted the "Alive" music video on my Facebook news feed. The thing about this is that I was actually in a very serious car accident where I flipped a car. I just never caught the skateboarder thing before.


Today, God gave me the opportunity to buy a homeless man a Mountain Dew. I was asking for God to reaffirm himself to me and he sent a homeless person to me to help. Then when I got home, I saw you guys were starting the first video shoot for a new music video for your upcoming album.


I do not even know if you guys are even getting these messages or not, but as of right now, I feel like I need to share this with you guys. Another thing happened to me recently. I saw two police cars that pulled over a pickup truck full with a bunch of Hispanics. It was very near my home. As I got further from my home, God moved in me a sense of compassion for these people and I started crying because I didn't want anything bad to happen to these people. I went back and they were not there. I prayed for them of course."


Then, on the 5th, I said this on the same forum,


"One need only do one thing to see God, to do the phenomenal, to embody the supernatural. One need only see the poor and the sick as an equal to himself and he will see God, he will do the phenomenal, and he will surpass that what is natural."


That does seem profound to me!


On the 7th I said on a forum,


"I am not quite sure what gives you the idea that the world is becoming less materialistic. As I understand it, the world is becoming more focused on "objectivity" and less on "morals". Ofc it depends what one's interpretation is, but I can say in my opinion of the world that the world is becoming less concerned with things that are not strictly quantifiable such as what is good, wholesome, and upright.


To be sure, our culture in the west is at an impasse of different ideas that counter each other. But I would say these different points of view tend to be getting more "reason" based and less "wisdom" based. IMO, things are only getting worse and not better. But I have hope. I have hope that there will be a great change in the pursuit of truth, which is not easily quantifiable by science because of its transcendent nature."


I also said there on the same day,


"What tripped me up about your previous comment was that you said that morals are for survival. I disagreed that morals should be used primarily to "keep people alive." I think instead whatever good we do, we should do for its own sake rather than even a benefit to our own personal well-being, and in fact, I think sometimes we may have to sacrifice our own well-being for the good of another."


On the 8th I said on X,


"Sometimes we have to go to dark places to see the light, but those who earnestly seek truth will be rewarded with the truth."


On September 12, Stephen Pinker said,


"Dozens of church bells with swatikas: A reminder that Nazism was not an “atheist movement,” as is sometimes claimed. Many German Christian groups supported the Nazis & vice-versa, united by their hatred of secular modernity."


And I said in reply,


"It's not the religion that makes the man, but the man who makes the religion. While, yes, there were "bad christian germans who supported hitler" there were also those who stood in opposition to what hitler stood for, and those are the true believers who were doing good."


On the 13th on a forum I said,


"I think there is little value in changing your mind for changing your mind's sake. Everything is contextual. The most essential part of changing your mind or not is what the actual motive is for doing so. Are you changing your mind about something that brings goodness or harm to the world or yourself? One should always be changing their mind based on the feedback they receive from knowledgeable and wise individuals, but it doesn't always work out so pretty because people can be lead astray by those who are in a position of power who may not have some actual wisdom to speak, but their own folly. This is especially true if the one in power happens to be very intelligent because they have the power to convince people who may not have as much conviction about their beliefs. To have a strong moral character is something that can change overnight, but it often comes with a lead up of circumstances/events that allow one of such radical change. It is all in the pursuit of truth! One can pursue what one thinks or one can pursue what is true and I would say oftentimes the two are mutually exclusive. But it is the condition of one's character in the first place that determines if they will change their mind to bring goodness or harm to the world. And don't be confused about this, there are people on both sides of the fence! There are also a lot of people that are not quite sure about a plethora of different things to which they don't have much conviction one way or another. The people on the fence are the people whose minds can be changed. It's not those who already have conviction, but the people who don't quite know what to think or believe. Those who act out of selfishness are the ones who if they do gain a conviction on things, it's usually to their own benefit which in turn more than likely turns the world a little bit more towards evil since selfishness is inherently greedy. Those who are inherently looking for truth are the people who will turn the world a little bit towards the good that is found in humanity. So before you change your mind on something, ask yourself if you are doing so for the benefit or ruin of the world."


On the 19th on X, I said,


"Just sending out a public prayer request. The 30th of Aug. I went to a @POD concert. My brother dropped me off. On my brothers way home, he got into an accident with a bicyclist. Of course, my brother did everything he could to make sure the biker was ok. Now the biker is suing."


On the 21st on X, I said,


"Righteousness is something that needs to be updated on the daily. Don't wait for an experience to get you in order. I am learning this."

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